I don't think it works that way. Kids learn more by example and reward than overweening pressure. Making your kids feel like they need to run away from you is not teaching them to thrive in the world. It's pushing them away and THEN the kids hopefully teaching themselves to thrive.

I think that's what a lot of overbearing parents do — mine certainly did. The keep their kids in a pressure cooker until they bust out. Then, the kids go off and thrive on their own and the parents get puffed up and make a lot of noise about how proud they are of their kids and how hard they had it to get them to be successful. If their kids are crushed by life, then — naturally — it's not fault of the parents who tried so hard; it's the ungrateful, headstrong kid's fault for not learning those lessons they tried to beat into them.