It's just wrong that time off for a friend's death is rarely allotted. When a dear friend of my husband's died, he had to take the day off without pay. This was many years ago; but, his employer actually said something to the effect that because it was just a friend it wasn't really that bad, not like losing a family member.

I don't think even today that many folks recognize that our friend groups are family – the families we've created for ourselves. And, we may be much closer to with that created family may than with actual kin.