It's not legally a hate crime, true. But, sexual harassment is a crime, though only a misdemeaner. It's hard to prove though because incidences all too often comes down to he-said/she-said. Unfortunately, no one tells us these things when we're so in need of them. Still, when we know, the threat of legal action can itself be a deterrent.

When your boyfriend choked you, that was a crime – either assault or domestic violence – and your body was the forensic evidence. He could not have choked you nor headbutted you without leaving visible marks – forensic evidence. At the least, you could have used that evidence to get a domestic violence protection order (commonly referred to as a restraining order).

I learned there are legal protections on the books from my Gran when she found out what I was going through when I lived with her while attending art school. I never had the chance to apply that knowledge because being armed with the knowledge, I could use the threat of it as a defense. I found after that, it's the rare perv who'll continue harrassment when they know you know how to make their lives legally untenable. And, it's a great way to make a perv back off of another woman too, to which us put that knowledge a couple of times in defense of fellow female students.