People who say that have either been fortunate enough to have mostly benefitted from affirmation from those around them… OR, they are the bullies themselves. Bullies will always tell you to "get over it," that you shouldn't let it bother you… that "we shouldn't be defined by our past."

That's a load of crap. We are ALL — to a person and/or a creature — defined by our past. Our past makes us, forms the way we move through the world. It doesn't matter if your a child, a woman, a man, a dog, a cat, or a capybara. Our past experiences define how we react and the choices we will make in our now and our future.