The worst is when folks tell you it's just a matter of discipline and to be tougher with them. That's what my mother — an actual former rehab teacher — told me when my son was diagnosed. Mother rejected the qualified doctors and counselor and presumed my child just had behavior issues because "You spoil that child."

Back then, it was a diagnosis of "ADHD on the Spectrum;" that was explained to me as ADHD being his primary presentation, but that the counselor thought he likely has high functioning Aspergers. The “ADHD on the Spectrum” was what went onto the IEP.

Something else never to say: Quite caring folks said they could see that he could be "mildly Aspy." WTH is "mildly Aspy?"